Just for Fun

How to fail as a mom and a wife in 10 easy steps:

  1. Dare to work out in the morning and leave your children fending for themselves during the hours of 4:45 and 6:30 am (with their dad sleeping at home)…they need you, every moment of every day (even when they are sleeping).
  2. Make a breakfast of eggs, fruit, and whole wheat toast…how dare you try and feed everyone something delicious and healthy…meanie!
  3. Say “no” when your kids ask if they can have Christmas candy at 7 am…you are the rudest!
  4. Give your daughter the wrong leggings to wear under her uniform (you know, the ones she loved yesterday)…how could you!?!?!?!?!
  5. Make your son wear uniform pants and a jacket in 30 degree weather…you unfeeling bi@#h!!!
  6. When your husband gets home from a 12 hour day, ask him to eat leftovers or a sandwich like the rest of the family did…you are a horrible wife!!!!
  7. Clean the house so well that no one can find their favorite things that have been laying around for days…are you insane?!?!?!?!?!
  8. Say Advent prayers every night for about a minute and a half…don’t you know there is TV to watch????
  9. Punish your two year old for pinching and hitting his sister…that is just how 2 years olds act, you should just ignore it.
  10. Make your kids take a bath on a regular basis…no one in the WORLD does this but you!!!!

failing-mom

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