I struggle with infertility for five years prior to becoming pregnant with Megan. The first three years I just thought it was normal and we weren’t ready for children. Year four was the rough one. Many of my closest friends had their first and were working on #2 while we still waited. It was a lonely time for me. As many people who struggle with getting pregnant know, those pregnancy announcements bring so much joy but also a ton of sadness and , for me, worry that I would never have one of those announcements to share. It was a terrible space to live in.

Then, by God’s grace, I saw those two fateful pink lines on January 1, 2009.  And here I am eight years later with three of the most precious gifts I have ever been given.

I always say to Megan that she made me a mother and to her I am forever grateful. And Tyler and Ryan made me a better mother which was icing on the sweetest cake ever.

Mother’s Day always is a touchy one for me. I am so happy to celebrate my own family, but I feel a great heaviness on my heart for those who want so desperately to start their family or grow their family. This pain is not lost on me, even 8 years later.

My kids are my greatest accomplishments and will continue to be for the rest of my life. My cup was overflowing yesterday as they presented me with hand-made gifts and cards and the sweetest picture collage. But the best gifts are the ones that I experience on the daily…their laughter, their hugs, the sweet little voices they have. I am so thankful for Megan, Tyler, and Ryan. I love them so much it sometimes hurts.

And in the day to day, when life seems so chaotic and unorganized, and messy it is important to look around and realize that within the chaos is the never-ending love that I have for my little ones.

Happy Mother’s Day!


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